Punk

Nikki and I have read the story of Joseph to our kids many times and afterwards we point out that through God, when things may look bad, our circumstances can change dramatically for the better by the end of the day. I have noticed that the way the kid's stories read, no matter which "version", Joseph was innocent and undeserving of any harsh treatment. This kinda perplexed me, after all, is there anyone in the bible that doesn't have something negative written about them?

At 17 years old Joseph was spoiled and he was a snitch. Look at it, his brothers couldn't speak to him without contempt and cursing. But that didn't keep Joseph from declaring his dreams of lordship over them. TWICE! As if being a daddy's boy and being a self important punk wasn't enough, he was either lazy or scared. Because when his brothers went out to work, Joseph hung out at home, until daddy got after him.

Then Joseph got lost looking for his brothers. Was it because he took his own sweet time to try to catch up to them or was he just clueless? On top of it all Joseph made it a point to wear the coat that daddy gave him. Was it the only coat he had or did he want to "remind" his older brothers how important he thought he was?

I cannot determine why God's favor rested upon Joseph after he was sold to Potiphar. Maybe it was after getting sold into slavery that Joseph realized he wasn't so special after all. Maybe reflecting upon how his life had been spared, Joseph was humbled. I don't know. I do find it interesting that Joseph fell into a similar trap with his boss' wife that he did with his older brothers. Was Joseph so unaware of his surroundings and the people around him that he could not pick up on their negative spirits? Or was it Joseph didn't learn from a previous mistake. In both circumstances, with his brothers and Potiphar's wife, Joseph was aware of the bad intentions of both. Yet he fell right into both of traps. Was he so self-confidant that he thought he was untouchable, that he didn't need to keep his guard up. Or was Joseph so naive that he didn't learn the fact that if his family could betray him, why wouldn't a selfish, libidinous woman?

Either way, Joseph failed to recognize his weakness and what was going on around him. He made the same mistake twice and both times it was very costly to his personal freedom.

But again, the favor of God is upon Joseph and he prospers running the prison. (A lot more to run than a household, maybe?) Did God's favor ever leave Joseph? I don't think so, I don't believe God is as fickle as people are when it comes to making mistakes.

It seems to me that Joseph was gifted at organization and leadership because of him being able to run Potiphar's house and the prison smoothly and later he would run the entire nation of Egypt. Which shows that first Joseph was faithful in the smaller things and the Lord increased him with bigger responsibilities.

Even after correctly interpreting the dreams of the baker and the cup bearer, Joseph was still imprisoned for two years. Think of that! Word must have gotten back to Joseph about what happened to the baker and the cup bearer, but he was still stuck in prison. Do you think he questioned God's purpose in his life? Do you think he ever asked God, "Why me?" Maybe Joseph asked God, "How much longer?" or "How much more do I gotta put up with?"

• I have been targeted by family and coworkers
• My attitude or words have brought out the worst in the people around me
• I have not learned from past mistakes
• I have been faithful in the natural and Spiritual gifts God has given me.
• I have used my skills or Gifts and have them seem to go unappreciated?

I know I have been a punk towards God, my family, friends coworkers and strangers.  I know that I can do better and I continue to press forward.  I also know that God judges the my motivations and not the successes of my work.  And if God does this for me, He does it for you.

I think everyone has endured along the lines of Joseph and if that's the case, then why can't you be blessed like Joseph. After all God doesn't love Joseph more than He loves YOU! There isn't anyone God loves more than YOU! (Go ahead an follow the links to those two verses and read how important you are to God)

So why can't you wake up one day in prison

and go to sleep that same night in a palace?

It Aint Easy Blessing Jesus When Life Sucks!

Thinking back on what Jesus has done in my life and His Faithfulness and what I carry around with me as reminder, I think about the song 'Blessed Be Your Name'. Its a song that seems to play on the radio at the just the right time Its a song Holy Spirit used to teach me the true meaning of Praise. But what is even cooler about 'Blessed Be Your Name' is its a song that my family has learned and sings together during good times and bad.

Back in 2006, I was at the strongest in my Faith at any time in my life up to that point. I was digging into the Word with passion. Instead of watching Sportscenter first thing in the morning, I was reading my Bible. Instead of watching cartoon network after work, I was marking up the margins of my bible with new insights. I dusted off the concordance and was "discovering" answers to questions I had noted in the columns years before. I was memorizing Scripture and singing Praise and Worship as I was banging around the house, even at work. I would even break out a song of my own while on the job or in the grocery store. Sometimes His love would be so great I would sing in Tongues. (I imagine this might have been odd to those who didn't know me, maybe even to those who did?) I was sharing Jesus with people, I was even praying for co workers right the spot. I was soaring! I was strong!

Man, it is easy to praise Him when things are going great.

During this time of strength, I made a few choices that would impact my life. I did not enter into these decisions lightly. I prayed about each one, I sought the advice of friends who knew me well enough to speak honestly with me. I confirmed my decisions with Scripture. I was confidant that I was in "God's will."
And right now, I can strongly say that some of those decisions that I had made were my will!
It sucks having to admit that. I hurts even more as I am still digging out from some of the decisions I made. Periodically, I have had to stop myself from thinking about "what if", "I coulda" or "I shoulda".

Coulda?! Shoulda?! DIDN'T!!

If I am honest with myself and with Jesus, during a period of great strength I made poor choices but it was a season of pain and suffering that has strengthened my Faith and character the most.

I went to church on one Sunday morning with Logan. That actually was a huge first step for me, because I was so pissed at God that I didn't want to waste my time at another Sunday "dis-service". Then I got lost looking for the church I wanted to visit. Like a majority of churches, 10:00 a.m. is the required start time, so with time running out, I gave up searching for that church. Instead, I pulled into a church that I had attended previously, many years ago when they held Saturday night services.

By this time I was irritable and I imagine it showed on my face because, the greeters and ushers let me walk by without the usual questions of "Is this your first time here?" "What's your name?" "Do you have our visitors packet?"

When worship began, I was tossing around all sorts of criticisms in my mind. As usual the sound was at concert level and the worship team wasn't leading the body in worship, but more so they were performing for the congregation. Then, after one song, the band stopped playing and announcements were given and the beggar's pots, errrr, collection baskets were passed around. It's interesting to me how often Worship of Jesus will get interrupted for announcements, collections, introductions and such, but I have yet to see a sermon interrupted for the same tasks.
By this time I was wanting to split! But I felt like Holy Spirit was asking me to stay. So as I am singing through a clenched jaw, I become overwhelmed with all the mistakes I had made that led me to this time of darkness. I wanted to bolt out of there so bad, but I stayed. I would like to say that is was me that made the decision to stick it out, but I know that it was His strength that enabled me to "endure". And then the song Blessed Be Your Name appeared on the overhead screen. I said to myself, "He is worthy of my praise! I am gonna praise God!"

It aint easy blessing Jesus when life sucks!

But it is so much easier to bless Him in difficult times,
than trying to slug through the slop and slime of life without Him
trying to dig myself out of my sin and mistakes.

Since then I have come to learn to recognize Holy Spirit's leading more clearly. I have now a greater discipline to accept God's direction. I understand that when He says wait, I better put the brakes on. When He says move, I better not hesitate.

After all, He is God and I am not!

Now, I am still a flawed man that can be overcome by selfish motivations and stubbornness. Both of which limit Holy Spirit's influence upon me, as well as my desire to do what He suggests. I will get out of line with His direction, His will. By having gone through the desert, I have learned to trust Him, to know that He wants to guide me. By praising Him because He is worthy and not because I feel happy enough to do it, I said to Jesus "Not my will, but Your will!"

Yeah, it was and is cool to have the love of Jesus so strong in my life that I can't contain it. But what is even more cool, is that I now can and will praise Him when life seems tough and unfair. No matter what happens in my life, no matter what I do, Jesus is on the Throne and He will remain there until God says otherwise. Dad has given me a will of my own and it is my choice, in good times as well as bad, to say God, blessed be YOUR name.

What's a Road Trip Without a Few Beers

What's a road trip without a few beers, a few tokes or a few lines?  I mean, dudes gotta have something to do on their way to concert or an outta town college, right? 

It really amazes me all the different ways Jesus interceded in my life after I confessed my need for a Savior. His Faithfulness, to my heart's cry as little kid would get me through years of selfishness, stupidity and self destruction. He was Faithful when I wasnt. 2 Timothy 2.13

All the times of driving drunk or stoned, all the times of riding with someone drunk or stoned and all the times getting busted by cops while drunk or stoned.  Even the times when I wasn't buzzed or high and got caught up with the police and I had something illegal on my person, Jesus was Faithful to keep me outta trouble.  There are also those times of deciding to walk, errr, stumble home, no matter how far away from home I was and no matter the weather conditions. It could only have King Jesus that saw me get home safely, because to this day I can't tell you how I did.

 Except for the time when an Iowa State Trooper let me ride in the front seat as he drove me the remaining 35 miles home. After staggering and bumping into each other for a few miles on gravel roads my bud and I finally reached a highway.  I'm not sure which is more miraculous, the fact that Jim convinced me that I needed to leave the fifth of vodka in the broke down truck before beginning the trek home or that he convinced the troopers I was of legal drinking age and I would not puke in the front seat of the car. 

Even when I didn't give a damn about anything except getting my head bad, Jesus was revealing Mercy and Grace back in the day.Even when I only called on His name when I was cursing, He was protecting me from myself.   

And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father’s hand. John 10.28-29

Landfill Compassion

If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion—how can God’s love be in that person?

1 John 3.17

I know of a couple of Bruthas that were asked by their church to help a single mom move a bed and some furniture.  It turned out that the church secretary had come someone wanting to get rid of these items.  The one dude was pretty jacked up because he had preached for years about how the body is supposed to step up and help out those in need.

That enthusiasm quickly turned to frustration and anger when he realized the  peeps giving away the bed and chairs was the County Landfill.  Not a member from the church or even another church, but items that were intended to be buried under all the trash. 

The two dudes moved things in and set up each piece in different locations as the mom and her friend suggested. It seems that no matter what condition the furniture and how empty a room is, it is difficult for two woman to decide where items needed to be placed. The single mom was excited that she would finally not have to sleep on the floor.  She was thrilled that her apartment now had 'adult' furniture other than the kitchen table and chairs. 

Anyways, the one Brutha who was pissed at the shallowness of the church, took it upon himself to give the single mom some cash so she could go out and buy some sheets, pillows and Lysol.  He requested that the mom didn't tell anyone about the amount or who gave it to her as he referenced James 2.15-16.  He did this in front of the younger Brutha deliberately, so he could show Faith in action. He did all this hoping to sow seeds of compassion and good works.

So you see, faith by itself isn’t enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless.

James 2.17

What Matters

But as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all the churches. Was anyone called while a Democrat? Let him not become a Republican. Was anyone called while Republican? Let him not be Democrat.   Democrats are nothing and Republicans are nothing, but keeping the commandments of God is what matters.  1 Corinthians 7:17-19(Kinda)

Jesus ain't a Democrat and He ain't a Republican. 

He is the Son of God!

His Kingdom is greater than the United States.

He is the King of Kings!

Jesus answered, “My kingdom is not of this world. If My kingdom were of this world, My servants would fight, so that I should not be delivered to the Jews; but now My kingdom is not from here.”

John 18:36

Then comes the end, when He delivers the kingdom to God the Father,

when He puts an end to all rule and all authority and power.

1 Corinthians 15:24

The Lord said to my Lord,

“Sit in the place of honor at my right hand until I humble your enemies,

making them a footstool under your feet.”

Psalm 110:1

I Don't Need

But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you.

John 14.26

• I don't need a title to minister Jesus.
• I don't need a degree to teach Jesus.
• I don't need is a building to serve Jesus.
• I don't need a pulpit to preach Jesus.
• I don't need a doctrine to qualify Jesus.

What I need is to be obedient to Him.

But you have received the Holy Spirit, and He lives within you, so you don’t need anyone to teach you what is true. For the Spirit teaches you everything you need to know, and what He teaches is true, it is not a lie. So just as he has taught you, remain in fellowship with Christ.

1 John 2.27

Christian Haters Hating Christians

I kinda wonder if the apostles that stuck around Jerusalem after Stephens execution belittled those who ran off? (Acts 8.1) Did they condemn them for their lack of Faith?  Did Pete, John and the rest of the crew brag to each other how dedicated and fearless they were?

I am aware of how hypocritical this entry is.(Romans 14.22??) I am hating on the Christian haters.  I am so disgusted with the 'gospel experts' sitting behind their keyboards and pulpits declaring everyone else a pharisee or a phony.  How many people have accepted the Gift of Eternal Life because someone pointed out a 'flawed' theology?  Contrarily, how many people have become confused or bitter because of all the negativity and finger pointing? 

Yes, I have had conversations come up with others about Joel Osteen, Benny Hinn, Joyce Meyer, the Christian haters online and local preachers. Yes, I have been asked questions about what those people preach.  And yes, I have volunteered my opinion what those dudes are preaching.  There are things about each one these dudes that I can disagree with and agree with. It is tough to not get caught up in threads and debates about who is right and who is wrong.  I like to post something totally irrelevant in the threads, such as Project 86 is the greatest band ever. Or if you don't know Mars Ill, you don't know Hip Hop.  Or even something as stupid as my favorite color is snot green. 

With such easy access to express an opinion, its kinda hard not to spout off what we believe about Faith, sports, politics, work.  I believe it comes down to each persons motivation. (Romans 2.16) Why do we do what we do? Why do we preach what we preach? Is it share Jesus or is it to argue and debate about things that only time will tell?

I think anyone that chooses to limit Holy Spirit to the doctrine of one person is a fool.  I think anyone that wants to spend their time and talents tearing down other peoples doctrines instead of praying for those people is a bigger fool. I think anyone that wants to preach hate instead of preaching the Love and Grace of Jesus (yes, that includes confession (1John 1.9)and repentance (Titus 2.11-14) of sin) is the biggest fool of all.  I think there are too many Christians playing the role of a fool.  And too many times I play the fool.

It's true that some here preach Christ because with me out of the way, they think they'll step right into the spotlight. But the others do it with the best heart in the world. One group is motivated by pure love, knowing that I am here defending the Message, wanting to help. The others, now that I'm out of the picture, are merely greedy, hoping to get something out of it for themselves. Their motives are bad. They see me as their competition, and so the worse it goes for me, the 
better—they think—for them. 
Philippians 1.15-17 The Message

Are You the Next Sam Holton; How About the Next Ed KImball

I don't know much about Samuel Holton. I don't know when he was born, when he died, what kind of life he lived or if he was a Christian. I do know that he was D.L. Moody's uncle and Holton reluctantly hired Moody to work for him at his Boston shoe store. Additionally Holton required Moody to attend Mt. Vernon Congregational Church in order keep his job. I know some about Moody, basically because of what I have read today. I know he was born in 1837, raised by his parents as a Unitarian, he has a college and publishing company named after him and he died in 1899. Previously I have read a little bit about him, nothing too in depth though. I have read more about Smith Wigglesworth, John G. Lake and other 'heavy hitters' of the Faith.

Another man I know very little bit about is Sunday school teacher Edward Kimball. Kimball taught Sunday School at the Mt. Vernon church that Moody attended, as required by his uncle. One day, Kimball visited Moody at work and shared with him the Love of Jesus and Moody was a changed man after that. After awhile, Moody left Boston for Chicago and immersed himself in sharing the Love of Jesus with others.

Moody was a pioneer of the Faith. He ministered to and equipped women and children in the late 1800's, not a common practice at that time. He saw beyond denominational limitations and preached Jesus wherever he was invited. His burden for the poor, minorities and uneducated children led him to start schools. Eventually Moody's vision of a school to equip people with the Gifts and train them to minister. He also started Bible Institute Colportage Association (BICA) in 1894 in his desire to provide Christian literature to average American.

So why the brief history lesson on the life of Dwight Lyman Moody? I want to show the importance of one man's ministry. No, I am not writing about Moody's ministry, I am writing about Holton's ministry to his nephew and Kimball's ministry to another church member.

What if Holton would not have had compassion upon his nephew? What if he would not have cared about his nephew's Spiritual development? Where could have Moody have wound up?

Kimball said the following about Moody before his Salvation, "I have seen few persons whose minds were spiritually darker than was his when he came into my Sunday School class."
Imagine if Kimball would have been too timid to visit Moody at his job and share Jesus with him? What if Kimball would have written off Moody as a waste of time?

Think of the millions that have been reached in the name of Jesus because of the efforts of D.L. Moody. Think of the millions that have been reached because of the efforts of Sam Holton and Ed Kimball.

Now take a look around yourself. Is there someone Holy Spirit has laid upon your heart? Is there someone who needs you to be the compassion of Jesus? How are you going to reach millions? Will it be with your words or your works? Or will it be from reaching the one who reaches millions?

Fight for Peace

I had the thought of holding onto a $100 bill on a windy day. How tight I would clutch, maybe even peeking into my fist, 'checking' to see if it was still there. I thought about what would happen if a gust of wind ripped it outta my hands and sent it flying across the parking lot. I saw myself running after it, following its every twist and turn in the air. I imagined other people staring at me in curiosity or outta fear depending upon my facial expressions, actions and cries of "God stop that money!" or yelling at complete strangers "HEY! Help me out here, please!?!" I wondered what would happen if it blew underneath a car, if I would drop to the ground and crawl on my belly over oil stains and discarded gum, stabbing at it with an outstretched hand. I wondered if I would run into traffic and halt cars as I stomped at the ground trying to pin Ben Franklin to the pavement.
I wondered what if someone else would have gotten to it first. An rough looking dude, an elderly lady or a small child? How would I respond if they tried to keep my money? Would I be rude, would I just grab what belonged to me irregardless of the consequences. In a way, I thought, it would be easier for me to confront the scary looking dude because if things got ugly, it wouldn't be bad if I brawled with him, even if I lost a couple of teeth. Whereas, if I picked a fight with the little old lady, it would be a lose/lose situation for me, let alone if she put me down and out how I would have to explain to my wife how I lost $100 and got beat down by a grandma.

All of this went through my mind as I walked from my car into the grocery store. (No wonder I forgot to get the diapers I was originally sent to the store to get, huh?) What had me thinking about this is how I could without hesitation or regard, fight and track down something of value that belonged to me. How it is possible for me to work so hard for something that is not permanent and that is fleeting, but I don't chase after Peace with the same frenzied passion.

As a believer, His Peace is promised to me! As a believer His Peace is mine to take a hold of and hang onto when times are rough and out of my control. But so many times I throw away His Peace because of my fears, my words or because of my laziness. I don't chase after a Peace that would be so much more helpful to me and especially those around me. I give up on pursuing it after a couple of half hearted attempts of seeking Him. I don't ask for any one's help in seeking what is mine to have. I don't make a 'public spectacle' of myself trying to claim what is mine.

Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.

Psalm 34:14

Check out the definition of pursue: Radaf-raw-daf'a primitive root; to run after (usually with hostile intent; figuratively (of time) gone by):--chase, put to flight, follow after, hunt, to be under persecution, pursue.

Now check out the definition of peace: Shalom {shaw-lome'}; safe, i.e. (figuratively) well, happy, friendly; also (abstractly) welfare, i.e. health, prosperity, peace: favour, (good) health, peace prosperous, rest,

Peace is definitely worth pursuing. It would definitely be worth me making a public spectacle of myself or calling upon others to help me when it is out of my reach. Peace is actually worth more to me than the things in life I am lacking. Money, relationships and circumstances have no guarantees. Hey, the world promises us nothing but trouble. Great friends, fat bank accounts and an easy life is not promised. But as believers, Peace is ours to have when we don't have enough money, ideal relationships and pleasant circumstances.

I can hunt and fight the things which are temporary and that can actually be a great source of my headaches or I can fight for that which will be with me when I have it all or have nothing at all.

Victory to Victory

The third chapter of Joshua tells of how Israel crossed over the Jordan on dry land. In the sixth chapter of Joshua, Israel conquers Jerhico. From one miraculous victory to another.

Imagine living that sort of life!

I believe what Israel did in chapters 4 and 5 are examples of what we can do after achieving breakthrough or victories in our own lives. In the fourth chapter of Joshua, immediately after the victory, Israel gave tribute to what God had done by building a memorial using rocks from the Jordan River. But sometimes it isn't enough to just give God our praise and thanks, sometimes we need to give him more. We need to give Him our everything.

In the fifth chapter of Joshua, they rededicated themselves to God. Now as a grown male I can imagine how quickly the celebrating ended after Joshua told of God's plans.

At that time the LORD said to Joshua, “Make flint knives for yourself, and circumcise the sons of Israel again the second time.”

Joshua 5:2

Thankfully Dr. Thede did that for me when I was a couple of days old, so I can only dreadfully imagine the pain those men endured . However, what God will ask of us is that we circumcise our hearts. As you may know, when Jesus focuses His attention upon a part of our lives that has not been surrendered to Him, it can be very painful. No matter what it may be in our lives, if we continue to hang onto something Jesus has asked us to surrender, we are being proud and stubborn.

God wants little to do with the proud. If we don't turn to His ways, He will give us over to our own selfish ways. It is up to us to yield our hearts to Him. By saying Yes to Him and no to our own ways we are actually allowing Him to circumcise our hearts. Our walk is continually like our Salvation. At His leading, we have to acknowledge that He is God and we are not. His way is the only way and our ways lead us away from Him.
So after a any Victory or a any breakthrough, no matter how great or seemingly insignificant, we need to acknowledge Him who is the giver of all good things. Then, we need to open up our hearts to His correction, His love and allow Him to circumcise our hearts and just like in Joshua 5:8, we must allow time for healing.

Instead of using flint knives to go from victory to victory

(thankfully)

we can simply begin by praying:

How can I know all the sins lurking in my heart?
Cleanse me from these hidden faults.
Keep your servant from deliberate sins!
Don’t let them control me.
Then I will be free of guilt and innocent of great sin.

May the words of my mouth
and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you,
O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.

Psalm 19:12-14

Remember it is God who does the work!

We merely have to be willing to yield to His correction, His way.

The LORD your God will circumcise your hearts and the hearts of your descendants, so that you may love him with all your heart and with all your soul, and live.

Deuteronomy 30:6

Up or Down

"It is those types of incendiary comments that prevents us from moving forward and advancing the dialogue of peace" she said with her head tilted in disgust.

"I find it deplorable that you are unwilling to make concessions that would benefit the majority" he quickly retorted. Without stopping he took control of the discussion with a tiring list of statistics and opinion polls that would overwhelm Sean Hannity.

"The disincentives that have been forced upon a minority in this house are inexcusable and are based in selfishness." she declaring now standing with both her hands on her hips.

While still dismissively waving his hand to combat her strong tone and posture he replied, "Your person is your responsibility, not mine! If I am to be held culpable for all the woe that befalls you now, when will I be absolved from being your personal guardian? Clearly, your agenda is not limited to hindering my inalienable rights but to usurp them "

After a very pronounced sigh and a slow shaking of her head, she spewed a rant with such repugnance that Keith Olbermann would plagiarize. After a lengthy pause she concluded, "It is imperative that a stand be taken now to prevent your fascist ideals from taking root and destroying the liberties and responsibilities which others have worked so hard to establish and ensure."

I finally could not take it anymore. I had to turn off the tv because I could no longer endure the fruitless 'debate'. "Logan start putting the toilet seat up before you potty or else sit down when you do."

What? You can't imagine my 7 and 6 year old debating the merits and responsibilities of putting the toilet seat up in such a manner? To me this sort of 'dialogue' is a real and constructive as a lot of the 'debates' that are on tv, radio and online

The sports and politics 'news programs' seem to be no longer about informing viewers but in promoting the opinions of 'experts'. These 'experts' bolster their agendas with words and tones that are not engaging but are intended to spurn any other view point. And if the expert's opinions are not enough to hold our attention, we can go online, text or call in our opinion. This allows us to make sure our 'voice is heard' on issues that will continue to be issues long after the 'polls' have closed.

Somehow, by knowing my opinion is 'supported' by a percentage of others that happen to be listening, reading or watching the same source I am is supposed to comfort to me?

It seems our culture disguises opinions as facts and rants as discussions. Too easily, I get caught up in conversations that become competitions. Too easily, I lose focus of what is really productive and get caught up in the futility of trying to prove that my view point is the only view point anyone should have.

Way too easily, I forget how foolish I look and the responsibility my words have.

Even fools are thought wise when they keep silent;

with their mouths shut, they seem intelligent.

Proverbs 17:28

"But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak,

they will give account of it in the Day of Judgement.

Mathew 12:36

Supertastic Leadership

I have learned more about God since becoming a Dad.  I have come to understand how He can love me even when I am at my absolute worst or most rebellious.  I understand the need for Grace and how it should never be earned, but given freely.  The love I have for my kids cannot even compare to the Love that God has for each one of His kids.

 Every night, each one of prays for all the moms and dads, all the grandmas and grandpas and all of our family and friends.  With the blended family and the competitiveness between Naomi and Logan, we had to group all those outside of our house together just so prayers wouldn't last 2 hours. After each individual prayers for the groups, one at a time, we will lay hands on each other and pray that Jesus would bless each Supertastic.

Jensen, the youngest Supertastic at 18 month old, has recently begun 'joining' us in prayers. When each one of will begin laying hands on the rest of the family, he will put his hands upon his head.  Pretty amusing and pretty cool that Jensen is growing up in a house of prayer.

Now I could wind up this entry about leadership with a verse (Proverbs 22.6)and how important it is we are aware of all the eyes upon us.  But I wanna go a little deeper.

See, even before Jensen began 'praying' with us, he was already intimating my leadership. One day when I got home from work, Nikki told me how Jensen was stomping around the living room with a scowl, an angry tone barking "NOW" while jabbing his little index finger at Nikki, Naomi and Logan.  Both older kids agreed, "He looks like Daddy!"A couple of days later I got to witness Jensen's 'outrage'. I gotta admit it was pretty funny, but even more convicting.

Is this what Jensen saw more of out of me? Is that what my family saw me as?  An angry, demanding Dad, that could only get his point across through fear or intimidation?  Is this what my kids are gonna remember the most about? 

So I will conclude with two verses.  Two verses that can instantly lead to confession to my Dad in Heaven about the kind of Dad I wanna be.  The kind of Dad I am supposed to be.

The righteous man leads a blameless life; blessed are his children after him.

Psalm 20.7

Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged; parents are the pride of their children.

Proverbs 17.6

The Church Needs a Mask

Maybe it might not be me that touches a million people, maybe I will touch that one that will touch a million.

Charles "Mask" Lewis

Charles Lewis, aka, Mask had a vision that I think some in the church could learn from. He had a vision, he had goals, but his passion and dreams were greater than himself. His desire for success wasn't just for himself, it was to see mixed martial arts prosper as a sport and to help open doors for mma fighters. His vision, his passion was bigger than himself. He accepted the fact that he played a role in something greater than himself and success could not be measured by what he did or did not accomplish.

Whether it is an issue of pride or an issue of control, sometimes the church can get its focus off of the message and place it on the number of people hearing the message. The focus becomes on the service rather than serving. The focus is on the volume and performance of the message and not the message. The church wants to reach millions, the church wants to advance the Kingdom of God, but on its own terms. The focus is on the pulpit, on the title or the status and not on the message or the journey. Quickly, a "program" or group is disbanded because of the lack of numbers or "results" without consideration of what Holy Spirit may be doing.

I see it in individuals as well. People that want to share Jesus with millions but they don't want to share Jesus with their neighbor, coworker or the grocery store clerk they see throughout the week. The thinking is that their calling, their message, their Gifts are so amazing, so anointed, it must be shared with the world but the time can't be made to share with those around them. That person knows they are called to preach, but only from the pulpit and not at the workplace. They know they are an apostle, but they are only willing to be sent out by the church leadership and not by Jesus. They know they are to be a pastor, but don't feel qualified unless they have the title before their name.

Too many times believers base their success upon the immediate results and forget what Paul wrote about in 1 Corinthians 4:5. Too many times believers are not willing to concede their own vision for Holy Spirit's vision. Too many times people are not willing to accept where Jesus has placed them in the Church. While some are trying to reach the world for Jesus, they overlook the people Jesus has brought into their lives for His purpose. The person that may get overlooked by someone focused upon their own "ministry" could be the one to reach millions.

The gifts and the calling are irrevocable and God will use anyone and wants to see everyone saved. It is possible for us to limit God by limiting how He can use us for His good work. It is possible to limit the work Christ can do, by limiting how, when and where we are willing to serve Him. We have to be willing to be used by Jesus according to His will, wanting others to succeed in their ministry.

When it comes to the Kingdom of God, does it really matter who delivers the Good Word or how the Gospel is preached? Does it matter what title we have, where we minister or who we minister to as long as Jesus is glorified?

It’s not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What’s important is that God makes the seed grow. The one who plants and the one who waters work together with the same purpose. And both will be rewarded for their own hard work. For we are both God’s workers. And you are God’s field. You are God’s building.

1 Corinthians 3:7-9

Two Anniversaries

On August 24, 2007, Nikki and I got on our knees before God and each other and dedicated our love for Him and each other.  We didn't take it lightly, and we had refrained from sex while dating because we both had been a part of relationships that had started out with sex or were based upon sex. And those were all failures.  We knowingly and willingly allowed sin into a relationship.  Or we had begun a relationship with sex and selfishness and instant gratification and shallowness and stupidity and......

On September 21, 2007, Nikki and I stood before a Justice of Peace so our marriage would be recognized by the state of Iowa and my employer. Nikki took Logan as her son and I took Naomi as my daughter. A mere formality, but it was still cool to include both kids.  It was definitely a Jesus thing, because both Naomi and Logan were supposed to be with their bio parents that weekend.  Nikki and I had known we were gonna get married.  When her employer dropped Nikki's health insurance coverage, we pushed the date up and dropped the notion of an all out wedding.

What is kinda ironic is if I woulda had a gay lover named Nick, I coulda added him to my health insurance coverage no problem. But since I was dating a woman, a very wonderful woman, I could not put her on my coverage. In the eyes of Jesus, Nikki and I were already married. Its just that the state of Iowa and my employer didn't recognize us as husband and wife. And most importantly, Nikki and I recognized the importance of honoring Jesus in our relationship and asking Him to be a part of our lives before we became one.

But if you don't have enough self-control, then go ahead and get married. After all, it is better to marry than to burn with desire.

1 Corinthians 7.9

Farmer Dave

"Satan can duplicate the Gifts of Holy Spirit but he cannot duplicate the Fruit of Holy Spirit."-Craig Bex

For false christs and false prophets will rise and show signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect.

Mark 13.22

And no wonder! For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light. Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also transform themselves into ministers of righteousness, whose end will be according to their works.

2 Corinthians 11.14-15

It seems to me that there are more people in the church today that are trying to 'prove' false christs than trying to prove the Love of Christ.  That people are trying to root out the tares (Matthew 13.36-43) instead of taking care of the wheat. I gotta admit that there have been times in the past where I thought it was my 'mission' to set straight theologies that I didn't agree with.  Sometimes, I was subtle, taking the Rabbi approach of answering a question with a question.  Other times, I was as subtle as a punch in the throat.  Because of my arrogance and lack of  Love, in most instances the only person 'convinced' was myself.

The true value of my works aint gonna be revealed until the Day when they are thrown into the fire. (1 Corinthians 3.12-13)  It is then that my real motivation will be seen, by everyone.  I am convinced that there will be works that I have 'successfully' completed that will burn as straw because I know that my motivation wasn't outta love.  I am also convinced that I will see some of my 'failures' reveal silver or gold because I was obedient and served Jesus outta Love, even though things didn't turn out the way I thought they should have.

As I step out into what Jesus is leading next in my life, it is so important to have my 'ministry', my focus,  where it needs to be.  Ministry aint about blog entries, the Gifts, results or me.  Ministry is about  me cultivating and giving away the Fruit of the Spirit. Ministry for me is being the best farmer I can be.

Rebellion Is Not Freedom

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.

2 Corinthians 3.17

When I am obedient, I have the most freedom.  When I listen and do what Holy Spirit leads, life goes a lot smoother. For years, I had the view of God as a quick to anger, hard to please Dad.  So there were many times I just did what I thought was best and asked Jesus to bless what I had going on.  And on those few occasions when I did 'wait' on God, I looked for or even created the confirmation I needed so I could still get my way.

Eventually, this sorta faith failed me too many times.  I wanted to stop learning things the hard way.  I was sick of repeating the same mistakes over and over, in private and in public.  I was exhausted from my sin that would reveal itself at the most embarrassing times.

Do I still live obediently? Unfortunately, no.  Do I trust God more? Definitely, yes!  It took a few years of abusing the Grace that had been given to me and dealing with the consequences of my selfishness and stupidity.  After a few years of justifying my disobedience as Liberty and surrendering Peace and Joy for fleeting moments of pleasure, I was empty and broken.

I finally realized that rebellion is not Freedom.

So think clearly and exercise self-control. Look forward to the gracious salvation that will come to you when Jesus Christ is revealed to the world.  So you must live as God’s obedient children. Don’t slip back into your old ways of living to satisfy your own desires. You didn’t know any better then.  But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God who chose you is holy. 

1 Peter 1.13-15

The Strong Getting Stronger

Even the strongest weight lifters need a spot. Sometimes the spot is precautionary, just for safety, with no effort exerted at all. Other times a spotter merely uses words to encourage the weight lifter. Sometimes words aren't enough and a spotter will use a very soft touch to help get the weight through a sticking point. And then there may be times when a spotter needs to pull the bar off the neck of the weight lifter.

As Christians, there are times in our Walk that we need a spot. There are times in our walk where we need to spot others. Admitting to a need or a weakness is not a lack of Faith. There is no Faith in being a prideful knucklehead. It actually takes more Faith to put trust in another Brother or Sister in Christ than it does to deny or cover up a weakness.

Paul recognized the importance of admitting to his weaknesses. It is a Christian's time of weakness that Jesus can be His strongest. It is when a person's pride is at its smallest that the Compassion of Jesus will be its biggest.

Sometimes Believers find themselves lifting a weight that too heavy or is just not of God. This is when the Body can grow in Love and strength and serve each other by placing greater importance upon other people and their needs. Maybe just a few words are needed to help out someone struggling.  Maybe it is just a little push that gets them through the 'workout'.  Maybe you are the only one that is there to pull the bar off their neck.

Asking for prayer isn'ta sign of weakness. Asking for prayer is a sign strong person wanting to get stronger!

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2 

Iron Men

I have been walking in my Faith since 1995 after Jesus saved me from myself and my alcoholism. I quickly became involved with the church where I was baptized in water and Spirit. It was awesome to learn about Jesus and to be a part of a group of Spirit filled believers.
It was at this church in Iowa City that I met a handful of guys that have blessed me to this day.
Larry, Jim, Ray, Chuck and Mike have all been instrumental in my Faith.

Larry is my Spiritual dad and mentored me for a year almost immediately. It was with Larry that I learned a real man of Faith does not have all the answers and will be honest enough to tell me so. I also learned to receive compassion and Grace as Larry and I met regularly to pray for each other and to hold each other accountable in our Faith.

Jim is a man that once you meet him, you will never forget him. Built like a tank, with a commanding voice and an awesome mind. When Jim quoted Scripture, it seemed to me that he was scanning the Bible in his mind searching for a verse. It was like he was speed reading each column and flipping the pages until he found the passage he was looking for. Jim has Faith that is beyond anything I have walked in. This man has grabbed a hold of Jesus and has hung on with everything he has, even when he was the only person that believed in himself.

Ray is my Spiritual big brother and just as a big brother will bring correction and 'show affection' with rough words or actions, Ray did the same in the Spirit. He has beat me up plenty of times with his version of encouragement, not because he was mean spirited but that's what was needed at the time. He always encouraged me to look to Jesus, even if it meant he had to pick me up off the ground and grab me by the neck and force me to look up. And just like any big brother he was there to help and to have my back whenever necessary. Spiritually, Ray knew when to put his arm around my shoulder and to say "I love you, Bro!" and when to slug me in the arm and to say "Get over it and get with Jesus!"

Chuck is a big guy who is great to have as a prayer partner but not so great to have as a lifting partner. You see, when lifting weights with Chuck when we would switch sets, we would take off more weight after Chuck's set than I would do for my set. I think Chuck would curl my bench press. Chuck is the first guy that I got together to pray with. We would go down to the University of Iowa and prayer walk around the campus. I learned a lot about hearing Holy Spirit's voice during these times of prayer.

Mike is a former roommate and an awesome friend. Mike was a great roomie, he was laid back and soft spoken and he never once threatened to demonstrate his 3rd degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do on me. He also would randomly pay my half of a utility or treat me to supper at Village Inn as he earned bonuses from work. The times of praying together and discussing the Word were great and I learned a lot about hearing Holy Spirit's voice.

None of us attend that church anymore. All but Chuck has moved out of Iowa City, but I believe that even if we all were still in that area, we wouldn't be attending there anyways. I am not bad mouthing the fellowship, I just believe that each one of us was called to follow Jesus elsewhere.

Whenever I get together or chat with any one of these guys, we wind up talking about the other dudes I have written about. I have been hanging with one Brutha when one of the others would call me. And before every good bye we wind up praying.

There were times where I had lost all contact with one of these guys, yet somehow I would get connected with them after a year or so. There even was a time so weak in my faith that I told Larry I was giving up on Jesus. I never did, because God is bigger than that, but also because I know Larry was praying for me. I don't know if any of my Bruthas could directly recall a time when Holy Spirit lead them to pray for me, but I am pretty sure that it has happened throughout the years.

But what was most important, with each one of these men of Faith, was whenever our paths crossed intentionally or unintentionally, I always, I mean it, every single time I encountered Larry, Jim, Ray, Chuck or Mike, these guys were seeking Jesus. No matter where I was at in my Faith, passionate or bitter, strong or weak, faithful or faithless, when I came into contact with one of these guys I came into a contact with a Righteous man, a man that was wanting more of Jesus.

I am in awe of how God placed these guys in my life back in the mid nineties, but I most in awe of no matter where anyone of these friends were in their Faith, they were still looking for more of Jesus in their life.

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17

Child Like Prayers

I remember it very clearly. Logan was 3 1/2 years old. He had pressed himself up against the wall almost has if he was digging his heels into the carpet preparing for a long hard fought battle. (As it turned out, that's what he had in mind.) "Don't wanna! Don't wanna! No, don't wanna!" He screamed, as he worked himself up, by rocking back and forth and using the wall to push off. I was baffled, I just told him to get his shoes. That's it. I was wanting to take him to the park after he had just woken up from his nap. But first he needed to get his shoes on. If only I would have said something along the lines of "We can go to the park and play after we get your shoes on." "Maybe if I would have approached it differently, we wouldn't be having this battle," I thought to myself. But I didn't give an explanation as to the need for the shoes and so now I was stuck in the middle of a meltdown. "But then again I am the parent, I know what needs to be done and I know when it needs to be done." I silently reassured myself.
I told him that once he got his shoes on we could go. He refused and became more upset. He wouldn't ask me for help, he barked at me that he didn't want to put on his shoes, he just wanted to go to the park. No matter how I responded, he was determined to stay in his mindset. He was not making the connection that I was wanting to give him exactly what he wanted, if he just cooperated with me. This had become a battle of wills and I could never give in to this ridiculous behavior. This was my child trying to dictate to me what should be done and I could not allow that, especially with such awful behavior. If I gave into this hostility and stupidity now, then I would have to deal with even more later on. I could not allow this selfishness and negativity take root because I love my son and I want him to grow as a Godly man. Proverbs 3:11-12

Then Holy Spirit impressed upon me, "Is that how you act when you pray to God?"

All I could do was laugh. I wanted to cry. In times past, it was how I prayed. And in some areas of my life, it was how I maintained my relationship with Dad. I prayed and acted like a 3 year old when I talked to God!

I wanted and demanded things of God in incomplete sentences. "Why?" "Why me?" "How much longer?" I repeated the same prayers over and over and over. "PLEEEEAAASEEE!" I would whine in a manner that I would not tolerate from my 3 year old. I told God where I wanted to go and told him that I was ready to go NOW! It didn't matter if I needed to do something before I got to go where God had intended for me to go, I was being told "Wait a moment, I need you to do something first" and that was infuriating and inconceivable! Right?

Like the ordeal Logan was putting himself and me through, I have had many tantrums because of me not getting my way. I knew what was best for myself and I just needed God's help to get it done.

Unlike Logan, I was a "mature" adult, only in the past my behavior had been much, much worse. I used foul language and insulted Dad when I had my meltdowns. I questioned His love for me. I questioned His intelligence. I questioned His generosity. And I did it in a disgusting manner that would leave me horrified if my child had acted in such manner. If one of my kids, who had repeatedly professed their love to me for years, suddenly vomited such nasty slop on me like what I had done to God, I would be in tears. I would find it very, very difficult to forgive. It would take a lot for me to overcome such a selfish, ungrateful, nasty behavior such as what I have exhibited in times past.

Or what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?  Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent?  If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him! Mathew 7:9-11

With all my shortcomings, selfish interests and the sin in my life I still want to give the best to my kids. How much more will my Holy Dad be able to give me because He is God and not because of what I do or don't do.

Just like I could not stop loving Logan because of his bad behavior and irrational thinking, I know God could never stop loving me. I believe this because I believe what the Bible says about God and me. I have also seen the love my Dad has for me because of the love I have for my kids. Even when I have been caught up in my selfish, shortsighted behavior, God is always there and He always will be there! He will never give up on me no matter how I act. Thankfully, He has matured me, He has lovingly corrected me and I have realized His love and the love of His correction. Revelation 3:19

Logan's meltdown took so long, that by time he had calmed down and apologized for his behavior, it had begun raining. He held his ground for nearly 2 hours. Unbelievable, he spent 2 hours inside, in a miserable mood instead of spending the time at the park playing with others and his daddy.

Hmmmm? How many times have I missed out on God's goodness and doing what I wanted to do because of my child like prayers?

Jordan

I have known Jordan since he was about 12.  He is now 24 and recently discharged from the Army.  Jordan was one of the kids in the church youth group I volunteered for. I was disappointed when Jordan told me he was gonna enlist in the Army.  He was a brilliant kid, very mature and had so many other options before him. I didn't just blurt out my opinion to Jordan.  I truly asked Holy Spirit for permission to speak my mind before I opened my mouth.  Jordan and I talked about it and that was the extent of it.  He felt lead by God to join and who was I to argue with him and Jesus.                                                                                                                Jordan eventually entered Ranger school.  He has told me that the prayers of others is what helped him get through the grueling training. Jordan would also asked for prayer when he went through Jump School.  I was often led to pray for Jordan's Spiritual training.  In fact, during this time of his service I was most concerned about his Spiritual growth.

When Jordan was about to be deployed, he would give a call and we would chat and pray.  During these times, I was sometimes conflicted as how I should pray.  After all, if I was praying for Jordan's safety, it meant that I was essentially praying for someone else to die. It seemed kinda odd to pray for Jordan to excel at his job because it meant I was praying for someone else to die. 

In no way did I want Jordan or any of his fellow soldiers to get hurt or killed.  But at the same time, there were people that would cross Jordan's path that would get hurt or killed.  And more than likely these people did not know the Saving Grace of Jesus.

I am proud of the man Jordan is and the accomplishments of his young life.  I am excited to see how Jesus uses this man to advance the Kingdom.  I love the Brother and I am thankful that he took on a duty that I know I could not have and would not have done.  I am thankful for the sacrifices all the soldiers and their families have made for the United States.  But I still have no answers for certain questions:

• How do some people feel led by Jesus to kill in the name of their country and others do not? 
• Is it responsible of me to pray for some one's safety and their ability as a soldier, knowing that someone is going to die at the hands of the person I am asking God to bless?  
• What is the difference between two people defending their warring countries?

I have no real conclusion to this entry, because I can't wrap my mind around this topic. I also am not really seeking answers to these questions. Jordan and no one else for that matter, owes me an explanation for their sense of duty towards their country.  And Jordan nor anyone else, will answer to me on Judgment Day. I put my trust and my understanding in God and His Word when it comes to the questions I have no definite answers for.

Even Gentiles, who do not have God’s written law, show that they know his law when they instinctively obey it, even without having heard it.  They demonstrate that God’s law is written in their hearts, for their own conscience and thoughts either accuse them or tell them they are doing right. And this is the message I proclaim—that the day is coming when God, through Christ Jesus, will judge everyone’s secret life.

Romans 2.14-16