2 Corinthians 3.17
When I am obedient, I have the most freedom. When I listen and do what Holy Spirit leads, life goes a lot smoother. For years, I had the view of God as a quick to anger, hard to please Dad. So there were many times I just did what I thought was best and asked Jesus to bless what I had going on. And on those few occasions when I did 'wait' on God, I looked for or even created the confirmation I needed so I could still get my way.
Eventually, this sorta faith failed me too many times. I wanted to stop learning things the hard way. I was sick of repeating the same mistakes over and over, in private and in public. I was exhausted from my sin that would reveal itself at the most embarrassing times.
Do I still live obediently? Unfortunately, no. Do I trust God more? Definitely, yes! It took a few years of abusing the Grace that had been given to me and dealing with the consequences of my selfishness and stupidity. After a few years of justifying my disobedience as Liberty and surrendering Peace and Joy for fleeting moments of pleasure, I was empty and broken.
I finally realized that rebellion is not Freedom.
So think clearly and exercise self-control. Look forward to the gracious salvation that will come to you when Jesus Christ is revealed to the world. So you must live as God’s obedient children. Don’t slip back into your old ways of living to satisfy your own desires. You didn’t know any better then. But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God who chose you is holy.
1 Peter 1.13-15