He Knew

It will be interesting to see the favorite verses we have as we share this week.  I realize that probably there is no one who picks much out of Leviticus as their favorite verse.  Although I do particularly like Leviticus chapter 19 which is the center of the Holiness Code.  I translated it from the Hebrew in class and did a word study on Holiness.  I still don't think I understand Holiness.  It is so rich with meaning and interpretation.  I grew up in a "holiness" tradition that was interpreted to mean how you dressed, whether you played cards or went to the movies.  It's so much more.

If I really understood holiness and its application, I'd share it today. But in spite of all my study, I still don't fully understand it.

I thought about verses in the New Testament.  One could camp on John 3:16 for a long time.  How wonderful it is that God loved the world and gave His son.  How wonderful that we have eternal life because of it.  How seriously we need to take John 3:16 implications.  We need to love as God loved and give.

However, as I thought and prayed over this blog I remembered an obscure verse at the end of Exodus chapter 2.  If you even read Exodus it's easy to gloss over.  In fact its never fully translated.  Exodus 2:25 in the NIV reads: So God looked on the Israelites and was concerned about them.  The Message ends with God understood.  The Amplified:  concerned Himself about them [knowing all, understanding, remembering all].  In the Hebrew the verse ends rather abruptly, it simply says, Yada' - to know.  God knew.

That gives me great comfort.  While it is easy to wonder where God was during the years of oppression and slavery, still He knew.  There came a time when He remembered.  There came a time when He brought deliverance for His people.  He knew.

I have a story that is all too familiar.  I experienced the trauma of childhood sexual molestation.  If you want to read more about this horrific experience, I did blog about it on Sounds of Hope and you can read it here.  It wasn't until I was well into the healing process that I wondered where God was when I was 8.  I wondered did He know? I asked the question we all ask at times, where is God when horribly things happen, or where is He when people are oppressed and misused?  As I asked Jesus where were you when I was 8? He answered me.  He said I was there and I was weeping.  I was weeping and praying for you and your healing. He said, I knew.

That was enough for me.  Theologians much better than I don't really have perfect answers to these questions.    But God knew.  God heard the cries of oppression from His people.  He always hears them.  He always knows.  And in His time, He brings healing and deliverance.  He sees and knows you too!

Run for your life, they are chasing you!

My first thought when I knew what we were going to write about this week was oh good, something "easy." Then I thought again. I'm a walking encyclopedia of old hymns and gospel songs. Thinking about Jesus and me triggered a song. The chorus goes like this:

Now it is Jesus and me for each tomorrow,
For every heartache and every sorrow;
I know that I can depend upon my new found friend,
And so to the end it's Jesus and me.

That led to a medley of songs including What a Friend We Have in Jesus. Seems we always think of Jesus being with us through some dark time. Sometimes it takes a long time to find him in the dark.

Being a preacher, I thought about a sermon I recently preached on Psalm 23. It's hard to preach on those passages we know the best. Everyone thinks they know all about it. I got a little long winded on the front end of the sermon so I didn't get to say as much about the last verse, the one about goodness and mercy. I wanted to really drive home that the correct understanding of the Hebrew is that it isn't that they follow you, it is that they chase after you. What an image, goodness and mercy chasing you!

Goodness and mercy, that sounds like Jesus. Sounds like it isn't just that we follow Jesus. He chases after us. In other words, He never abandons us. Regardless of what's happening in life, goodness and mercy are still chasing us.

I have lots of stories about Jesus showing up. I've told about Jesus showing up by miraculously sending someone to my door to provide food for us. I have a lot of stories like that one. The one that came to mind for today is long. I can't tell it in its entirety here.

You can read more details about the beginning of it here. I am like countless other people who have suffered under the hands of a pedophile. We read a lot about it now. When I was a child, it was kept secret.

For most of my life, I was unaware of the effects this had on my life. Like with any devastation that needs healing, first you have to have a diagnosis. As God miraculously began the healing process I got to the place where I wanted to know just where Jesus was when I was 8 years old.

I've never been much of a blame God type of person. However, I wondered. Where was Jesus? Countless people through the ages have asked the same question. Just where is this Jesus when everything falls apart, when death comes, when people misuse you, etc. The reasons we might ask where Jesus is are as many as the people who have ever walked the face of the earth.

I had heard that some women I knew, who like me, had been abused had asked the same question. They said they had an answer. They said they wouldn't tell it because each person had to hear an answer for themselves. Nonetheless, they also said that after they had their answer they told each other. They had heard the same thing.

I asked the question. I asked Jesus, where were you when I was 8? I waited for my answer. I finally got one. Jesus said He was there. He said I was standing in that doorway with you. I was weeping for you. I was interceding for your life and the healing I am now bringing to you. I was there. I saw it.

I know this raises all sorts of theological questions. We could go on forever asking why didn't He stop it. I don't know that answer. I do know that Jesus was there. I know He was there feeling the deepness of my pain. I also found out it was the same answer He gave those other women too. Jesus is always there. Goodness and mercy chased after me from that day forward. Eventually healing would come as I stopped long enough to let them overtake me.

Shortly after that, while receiving communion I thought about Jesus taking away the sins of the world. I though about my own sin, but that day I also thought about the sin of my abuser. His sin, not mine, had left deep wounds and scars. Jesus died for the wounds and scars that my abusers sins had left on me. Jesus died for your sins but also for the effects of someone else's sin on your life. That's pretty awesome.

I wanted to tell you about Jesus exploding in my life on some majestic hillside. I really wanted to tell you some happy story. But this is a happy story. Life is very hard. Life sucks much of the time. Injustice flourishes. Knowing that Jesus is always there, that His goodness and mercy are chasing after us is wonderful news. It is good news. It is the gospel.